New Zealand prime minister suggests sinister motives might be afoot in the assault on Jesse Ryder, amid a flood of well wishes and expressions of shock at the attack

ESPNcricinfo staff28-Mar-2013″It sounds quite sinister to me. I mean the fact that there would be four guys attacking him, [from] the media reports I saw looked somewhat unprovoked, and there must be something behind that. The assault seems very vicious so obviously we wish him a speedy recovery, and I’m sure the police will be working to get to the bottom of it.”
“We don’t need security. This is a nice suburb. We run security, we run doormen on the weekend, purely to make sure we have no intoxicated [people] and no underagers at the venue. It’s not about having bouncers on the door. We have doormen that meet and greet and say farewell to the guests … the bar runs very well, we have got nice clientele, and we don’t need security early in the week.”
“Thanks for the calls and msgs of support for Jesse. Just heading to Chch to see him.”
“We are all shocked by what has occurred and extremely concerned for Jesse. New Zealand Cricket’s thoughts are with him and his family.”
“This is very unfortunate. He was looking forward to come, and he was supposed to board the flight for Delhi tomorrow [Friday].”
“We are extremely saddened by the incident, we’re very concerned for Jesse’s well-being of course. He’s been a big part of the team and the organisation for a long time now. Our primary focus right now is Jesse’s welfare, and that involves supporting his family and his management as much as we can, hospital staff as well. We’re also working very closely with the police in terms of their investigation.”
“Come on @DijaRyder show the fight you have within thinking of you brother.”
“Thinking of you mate @DijaRyder”
“I am devastated. I just hope he pulls through, I don’t know what else to say.”
“Lots of positive thoughts for your recovery @DijaRyder… To those cowards, you are not cantabrians or even NZ’ers, you are disgraceful.”

Graeme Swann claimed his best Ashes figures of 5 for 44 on the second day and felt his dismissal of Chris Rogers constituted one of the worst pieces of cricket in Test history

George Dobell19-Jul-2013When a bowler takes a wicket with a full toss as ugly as the one Graeme Swann delivered to Chris Rogers, he can be fairly confident it is going to be his day.Certainly Swann admitted to some “outrageous fortune” on his way to claiming his best Ashes figures of 5 for 44. He was even happy to float the suggestion that the dismissal of Rogers constituted the “worst piece of cricket in Test history.”It all helped to underline that Swann and his England colleagues were the beneficiaries of as inept a performance of Test batting as Australia has displayed on this famous old ground since the Second World War.On the ground where Don Bradman and Greg Chappell made Test centuries, where Steve Waugh lifted a World Cup, and where Keith Miller and Glenn McGrath ripped through England’s batting, Australia produced a performance unworthy of their proud heritage. England weren’t required to operate in anything above third gear.That is not to say that Swann and co bowled poorly. Far from it. But, on a pitch on which Swann England rated a par score at around 400-450, to dismiss Australia for just 128 was reflective not just of a solid bowling performance but of something rotten within the Australian batting.It sounds harsh, but the standard of cricket in this series has been oddly mediocre. While there have been outstanding individual performances – the batting of Ian Bell and the bowling of James Anderson stand out – the batting of both top-orders to date has been some way below that expected at this level. And on the second day of this game, England’s bowlers did not need to be anywhere near their best to dismantle an Australian batting line-up who are in danger of being remembered as the weakest to have represented their nation.At times, England were not even forced to earn wickets. Phil Hughes fell to a wild swing, Ashton Agar was run out in a style that might have been considered too slapstick for inclusion in a Laurel and Hardy film and Rogers should have hit the delivery that dismissed him into St John’s Wood High Street.Even Shane Watson, the man promoted to open the batting due to his superior technique, fell after attempting to play across a straight ball in the over before lunch. Rarely in Test cricket are wickets sold so cheaply.For that reason it is necessary to maintain some perspective while judging this England performance. Their top-order batting continues to under-perform, they missed two relatively straightforward chances in the field and they were obliged to use a succession of substitute fielders as several members of the team left the field to gain treatment for various aches and pains. On a flat pitch and under a hot sun, they should have faced a draining day.Instead they found life easy. Australia, showing the fight of a pacifist kitten, produced a display of batting so lacking in backbone or intelligence that it reduced a full house crowd to something approaching bewilderment.The issue of DRS typifies the contrast in professionalism between these two sides. While England have devised a largely successful formula that involves calm decision making, Australia continue to treat DRS as if it is a form of barely intelligible black magic.Brad Haddin’s pre-match comments that Australia “go on feel” and that the DRS “is not actually a big thing” sounded strangely fatalistic, even amateurish, in the modern game where analysis plays such a huge role. Leaving such an important area to chance is a dereliction of duty and is costing Australia dear.Swann is a fine cricketer and arguably England’s best spinner since Jim Laker. But he will never take a softer five-wicket haul in Test cricket than this. Although the pitch is dry and a few balls turned alarmingly from a largely unthreatening line outside the right-handers’ leg stump, Swann benefited most from some reckless batting.He claimed two wickets as first Usman Khawaja and then Ryan Harris tried to drive him over the top and skied catches. He gained another when Brad Haddin attempted to slog-sweep a delivery from outside off stump. The Rogers dismissal, described as “embarrassing” to batsman and bowler by Swann, will win mentions for years to come as a contender for ‘the worst delivery to take a Test wicket.’Only Steve Smith, brilliantly caught by Ian Bell at short leg off a delivery that spat off the pitch and took the batsman’s glove, could claim innocence for his downfall.”It was a mixture of good bowling and a bit of outrageous fortune,” Swann admitted afterwards. “The Rogers dismissal was very strange. I can’t put my finger on why it happened. I’m not sure there’s been a worse piece of cricket in Test history. I’m sure he’s as embarrassed about it as I was. It was one of those freaky things. It completely slipped out of my hand.”Swann certainly bowled better than he had at Trent Bridge. While he is yet to regain the remarkable accuracy that has typified his bowling in the past, he was noticeably tighter than he had been in the previous Test and, against such fragile opposition, it proved enough to make them buckle. He is the first England spinner to claim a five-wicket haul in an Ashes Test at Lord’s since Hedley Verity in 1934.Describing the performance as a “boyhood dream”, Swann said that his previous mention on the Lord’s honours board had been tarnished when the game became the focus of allegations about spot-fixing.”I’m on the honours board once before from a game against Pakistan,” Swann said, “But that was tainted. So to get it up there in an Ashes game is a boyhood dream. For a while I was thinking I might get on the batting board this morning, but agonisingly I fell 72 runs short.”England maintained the pressure well in the field. Stuart Broad, again bowling better than his figures suggest, executed England’s plan to dismiss Michael Clarke perfectly – a succession of bouncers left him reluctant to get forward and pinned on the foot by the full delivery that followed .Tim Bresnan, recalled in place of the enigmatic Steven Finn, justified the decision by providing few soft runs, James Anderson delivered eight maidens in his 14 overs and the ground fielding showed impressive commitment and athleticism. It was typified by Jonny Bairstow who, with England leading by almost 250 with Australia nine down, turned a four into a three following a long chase and diving stop on the long off boundary.England’s fortune extended into their second innings. Had Joe Root been caught on eight, a simple chance that passed between first slip and keeper, the scrutiny on his new role of opener would have increased and Australia might have scented an opportunity to clamber their way back into this game. Instead an opportunity to lift the mood was transformed into another dispiriting setback and Root went unpunished for his lapse.For those England supporters who grew up familiar with the ritual humiliation that characterised Ashes encounters in the 1990s, there will be some grim satisfaction in days like this. But for those who relish combative, good quality cricket, this was a bitterly disappointing experience.In years to come, this period may be remembered as the lowest ebbs in the history of Australian Test cricket. It would be unwise to read too much into England’s current ascendancy.

Zimbabwe showed good application in the first two sessions and with more Test experience they could avoid being suckered into traps set by the Pakistan bowlers after tea

Firdose Moonda in Harare10-Sep-2013Until 19 minutes after tea, Zimbabwe were making a strong case for why they deserve to play more Test cricket in what could be their last long-format fixture until July next year. They were 172 for 3, had seen off an hour of high quality seam bowling on a lively surface in the morning session. Two of their batsmen, one of whom was still at the crease, had made half-centuries and their line-up also featured one partnership in excess of 100 runs.Then, Malcolm Waller fell into a trap that had obviously been set for him. Having watched Waller’s ease against the spin of Saeed Ajmal and Abdur Rehman, Misbah-ul-Haq brought back Junaid Khan to try and unsettle him. He delivered four short balls in the first over Waller faced but started the second by reverting to a good length. With the fourth ball, he held it just back of a length and Waller was trapped.Perhaps expecting a slightly fuller length, Waller did not move his feet at all as he fished and found only an outside edge. That started a familiar middle-order wobble, which Zimbabwe had managed to avoid in the last Test but which they have become known for. They lost 4 for 31 to turn the innings from respectable to needing rescuing.Zimbabwe’s position did little to reflect their hard graft earlier, which once again demonstrated their top-order has the temperament for Test cricket. For the first 10 overs, they had no choice but to try and survive.Junaid moved the ball both ways in a spell that underlined his worth to the Pakistan attack while Rahat Ali backed him up fairly well. Through a mixture of either moving the ball away from the batsmen at the last instant or swerving it back into them, Junaid ensured Zimbabwe had to play at all but four of the first 30 balls he bowled. Rahat was slightly less menacing and made them go for 21 of the 30 balls he delivered. Between them, they also beat the outside edge eight times in 10 overs.Tino Mawoyo went early and Vusi Sibanda and Hamilton Masakadza came close to following. Neither were sure what Junaid was going to present them with next and hasty withdrawals of the bat could easily have taken the edge. Run-scoring was almost impossible and if bat managed to find ball, it was only with the aim of defence.A far lesser side than Zimbabwe could have found themselves four or five down in the face of hostile, incisive bowling by Pakistan’s pace attack. That they did not, would only have helped the confidence of the batting pair, especially when Younis Khan came on and offered some relief.For Sibanda, the self-assurance overflowed too quickly. He resorted to his favourite stroke, the pull, and ended up playing on. Questions will rightly be asked about his ability to pace an innings and whether he becomes too aggressive too quickly, especially since he has not scored a Test fifty in almost two years.He need look no further than his captain, Brendan Taylor, for an example of how to hang back until absolutely sure. Taylor, who knew he was struggling for form in the lead-up to this match, played just five scoring shots in the first 60 balls he faced. His boundary came off an edge to the third man boundary and the three singles he scored in that time were the result of slightly better timed pushes than the ones he was employing in defence the rest of the time.Taylor did not take risks because he was battling through the initial stages of his innings. When Pakistan overpitched, he mistimed his drives. When he got a full toss, he did not hit it with any power and eventually he resorted to trying one of his favourite one-day strikes, the ramp over the wicket-keeper’s head but when he could not even get hold of that, he knuckled down and waited for something to go his way.Only when the spinners started giving it a bit more flight, did Taylor start to come into his own. With nothing more than sheer determination, Taylor found his rhythm and he had the luxury of time because Masakadza was playing a fairly fluent knock, and was especially comfortable against the spinners, on the other end.Masakadza was well-set, enough to suggest hopes for a Test century, but when he was dismissed, it was up to Taylor to bat through the day. He enjoyed a sprightly stand with Waller and had that grown, Zimbabwe’s promise may have been fulfilled.Zimbabwe endured a period of play that even their most loyal supporters are calling more of the same. Waller threw it away, not realising he was being set up by Junaid, Richmond Mutumbami was careless in the channel outside off stump and tried to play a defensive stroke too late and Elton Chigumbura was bowled by a Rehman delivery that kept low – a sign of what this surface will deliver as the match progresses.Greater awareness may have saved all three of them and the lack of such foresight is the clearest indication that Zimbabwe need to play more Test cricket. Without facing bowlers for extended periods of time, they will not know when plans are being worked out against them and how to guard against that.Building and timing an innings is learnt only through practice and only batsmen who are able to make those skills a habit succeed at Test level. This innings could be Zimbabwe’s penultimate chance to do that.They will bat again in this Test but then face at least nine months with no Test cricket, because of the postponed Sri Lanka series and a flawed Future Tours Programme. Zimbabwe’s performance in this series should stand as a reason why they should not be left out in the cold and despite financial and fixture concerns worldwide, something should be done to ensure these players benefit from more time in the middle.

One first-class innings in six months, the heat of the Middle East, his team 1-0 down in the series, probing left-arm quicks and spinners. It would have been enough to overwhelm many players, but Graeme Smith rose magnificently to the challenge

Firdose Moonda in Dubai24-Oct-2013Graeme Smith took three purposeful strides out of his crease, steered his bat with a heavy bottom-hand, met the delivery with the lower-third of it, cleared midwicket and saw the opportunity to take two runs. As he turned for the second, he was facing his team-mates. They rose to their feet, he raised his arms. Then, he took his helmet to reveal expression – square-jawed scowl.If captured in isolation, it could be mistaken for pain or exhaustion. When understood in its context, it is the face of someone who values the rewards their own determination can bring. Smith’s fifth double-hundred, which included the 9000th run of his decade-long Test career, should be decisive in ensuring South Africa win the Test match, share the series and maintain their seven-year unbeaten streak on the road. All of that was written on his face when he brought up the landmark.Smith’s name is not often mentioned when all-time greats are discussed but this innings was another illustration of why it should be. It was a test of skill and stamina, starting with an examination by the type of bowlers Smith least prefers facing – left-arm quicks – and culminating with a counterpunch to the elements of high heat and humidity which would have melted a less resilient man.Mohammed Irfan threatened to dismantle Smith first, smacking him on the pads as he moved across to try and hit through the leg side and then slicing him in half with a delivery that rose off a good length. Smith was uncomfortable, maybe even a little rattled, but immovable.Then he had Saeed Ajmal, who drew him forward and turned the ball away from him to beat the outside edge multiple times, to contend with. Ajmal kept teasing, Smith kept swatting him away and then, drove him down the ground. That shot, played before tea on the first afternoon, was the stroke that indicated Smith had his eye in.He has previously revealed he knows he is in a good batting mindset when he is able to drive straight. By the end of play on the opening day, Smith had brought up his half-century with two boundaries unfurled down the ground. By stumps on the second day, 30% of his runs had come in the V which is a considerable portion for him. As way of a basic comparison, in his previous hundred, the 122 at Adelaide, just 9% of the runs were in that area.His runs down the ground in this innings included the shot he brought up his century with, cleanly and confidently struck off Ajmal. It also contained the hoist over mid-on, to bring up 150. Both those demonstrated how well Smith had settled in against the spinner and how assured he was in his own ability to step out and meet them.

When he walked off the field, ankle intact despite concerns and the run bank refilled after a lengthy absence from the game, Smith could work tall having ticked off another feat

For the rest, there was an expected amount of hacking. Smith’s un-pretty technique is cricket’s version of a butcher slicing with the grain instead of against it. Meat fibres are flayed awkwardly; chewing, swallowing and even digesting is a test for the system rather than an experience of culinary delight, but for the hungry it does the job as well as a perfectly carved and seared piece of meat would.And Smith was starved. He spent six months out of the game recovering from ankle surgery and on a lifestyle program that saw him lose 12 kilograms. He batted once in a competitive situation before arriving in the UAE and spent just 15 balls at the crease in the warm-up match. He was not “out of form,” as Mohammad Akram said because he did not have enough game time for that assessment to be anything but an exaggeration.What he was, was out of practice. That was why he had to “scratch hard and stay at the crease,” which Akram credited him for. In his own words, he had to “find a way,” because “I don’t think I have ever been the most talented batter.”His way has always involved muscling the ball through the leg side in a laboured fashion and he relied on that as much as ever, even after he crossed the 200 mark. Today. it also involved “keeping your focus,” despite an increasingly weary bowlers who seemed to run out of attacking ideas and wearing a blow from Irfan which struck him on the helmet and “gave me a buzzing head for the rest day.”That was the closest he came to being felled. For the rest of his time at the crease, Smith barely took his eyes off the ball and did not offer any genuine chances, not against a fiery Irfan or against the toiling spinners who induced leading edges towards the end of the day. He took no risks.Graeme Smith’s wagon wheel shows plenty to the leg side, as usual, but also how he collected runs straight•ESPNcricinfoFor that there was AB de Villiers. He survived a chance off the first ball he faced, would have been out lbw for 25 had Pakistan had reviews in hand, was given out on 96 before reviewing himself and benefiting from too much turn from Ajmal and survived a run-out chance, but in-between he was agile and aggressive to complement Smith’s heavy-handed style of play.De Villiers provided the frills – the footwork, the reverse-sweep, the aerial drives and innovative pulls. He also provided the nerves. The cramping up as he reached his century, the singles that someone else would have been happy to turn down and in so doing, he was the mental energy supply Smith needed to keep going.Physically, Smith did not seem to be under as much strain as de Villiers and admitted he was took quiet schadenfreude in seeing the “young whipper-snapper at the other end cramping,” while he was untroubled by dehydration. He was, as is only natural, tired by the end of what he thought was the “hottest day of the tour,” but he was hugely satisfied that he had come through without any discomfort.When he walked off the field, ankle intact despite concerns and the run bank refilled after a lengthy absence from the game, Smith could work tall having ticked off another feat. “Scoring a double-hundred in sub-continent-like conditions was good for me,” he said.Smith already has a list of achievements that include becoming the 12th player to go past 9,000 Test runs, and being behind only Sunil Gavaskar for the most runs as an opener. The number of runs he has scored as a captain – over 90% – has resulted in much comparison with Allan Border. Smith has already captained more times than Border and said if the legacy he leaves “is even a quarter,” of what Border’s was with Australia, he will be satisfied.But the record that may be most relevant for him and his team-mates tonight is that Smith’s innings has done a huge amount to make match safe. Every time Smith has scored a century, on 26 previous occasions, South Africa have not lost the Test. That’s leadership in its most explicit and unique form. As his wife Morgan tweeted: “There’s only one Graeme Smith.”

England have lost control of their game in a very public fashion

Daniel Brettig at Adelaide Oval09-Dec-20130:00

Chappell: Swann’s place in question

During a charity golf day in the 1990s, Seve Ballesteros settled over the tee and announced to a large gallery that he would hit a deliberate slice. As the laughter from the stroke subsided, he declared that now the fun was out of the way, his next would be fairway-bound. When this stroke also veered right into the trees, no-one laughed. Golf’s master manipulator had lost control.Over the first two Ashes Tests in Australia, England have increasingly worn the puzzled expression that passed across Ballesteros’ face that day. For so long a team of tremendous self-discipline and application, shepherded by another master manipulator in Andy Flower, they have lost nearly all semblance of calm and control.This has been most evident in their fevered batting against Mitchell Johnson, but it has also been visible with the ball and in the field. Australia have goaded England into dancing in a manner with which they are neither familiar nor comfortable, resulting in two of the greatest maulings of their history. A team known for steadiness, determination and method are employing nothing of the sort. A team known for playing within their limitations have forgotten what they are.Stuart Broad summed all this up in the space of an extraordinary sequence in the first over of the final morning in Adelaide. Having hooked Peter Siddle for six, he perished to a catch at deep square leg attempting to repeat the shot next ball. Broad is better than that, yet he found himself doing it just the same. Kevin Pietersen, Alastair Cook, Matt Prior and Graeme Swann, to name four senior players, can all tell of similar torments.In the aftermath of Adelaide, Cook had no trouble admitting that his team had fallen away from what worked for them. Frank words have been exchanged within the team across the second Test, particularly after the batsmen played dead on the third day. “We haven’t batted very well, and when you do that people start looking at shot selection and execution,” he said. “We’ve probably gone away from what we’ve done [previously]. I lead from the front in that way, and I’ve got to make sure I’m better than that.”By contrast, Australia’s progress has been the result of working out precisely what their most effective “brand” of Ashes cricket would be. It has been a long and arduous search, spanning several years and many players and support staff. As recently as the start of the England tour, Michael Clarke’s team looked no closer than ever to finding the key to locating their best. The appointment of Darren Lehmann as coach helped, as did Clarke’s resignation as a selector, stabilising the atmosphere of the dressing room and the tenor of selection.A period of planning and discovery ensued. The batting line-up was shuffled relentlessly in England, drawing valid criticism at the time but resulting in conclusions from Lehmann and Clarke about who needed to be in their team. David Warner was tried in the middle order then returned to the top. Chris Rogers joined him. Shane Watson settled in to No. 3, Steve Smith to No. 5. Clarke left his comfort zone to walk in at a more suitable No. 4. George Bailey won his place at No. 6 by attacking R Ashwin in India. Ed Cowan, Phillip Hughes and Usman Khawaja were discarded.Among the bowlers, Ryan Harris, Peter Siddle and Nathan Lyon earned their places by bowling to a high standard in England, though the spinner had to fight especially hard for his place after twice being dropped for lesser twirlers. Johnson had not been risked in the Tests in England but moved to the forefront of the selectors’ thoughts by frightening out several batsmen in the ODIs that followed. With Harris and Siddle more than capable of keeping things tight, Johnson became a viable shock weapon of the kind the great Australian sides have always favoured.Stuart Broad summed up England’s problems during an extraordinary sequence on the final morning in Adelaide•PA Photos”It’s been about trying to work out how you use him best in the team,” Clarke said of Johnson. “I think our attack right now, and that includes Nathan Lyon and Shane Watson and the other two quicks, really complement each other. That allows Mitch to be used the way I feel is best for our team right now. And Mitch has played a number of roles through his career. But I think his role in this team right now is complementing our attack.”Attitudes were also examined. Among the least savoury moments of the England tour was Warner’s punch of Joe Root in a Birmingham bar following the loss of Australia’s opening Champions Trophy match to England. While Warner was punished for his action, team leaders were appalled by the thought that Australian players had been out socialising with Ashes opponents after their first loss of the summer. While sledging is not the subject of explicit team discussion, the tourists were reminded to remember who their opponents were, and that their job included making life uncomfortable for England at every opportunity.Back in Australia, the selectors contributed to this by denying Cook’s team the sight of any particularly fast bowling until Brisbane. The one spell of decent pace England did glimpse, by Ben Cutting for Australia A in Hobart, revealed frailties that Johnson, Harris, and Siddle would soon exploit. Tymal Mills and Harry Gurney were flown over by the ECB to provide left-arm pace practice, but their provision contributed as much to Australia’s notion that Johnson would pose problems as it prepared the Englishmen themselves.All the while Australia played a game of public provocation, speaking of their desire to be aggressive while chiding England for pursuing what Lehmann called a “dour” style of play. Cook, Flower and others registered their irritation at this goading, often referring to the results that style had reaped. But over time it had some sort of effect, at least subconsciously, leading England to a Brisbane posture that seemed more about the fight than the process.So when Clarke unleashed his pacemen on England at the Gabba, there was a sense of fight-or-flight reflex about the tourists. Apart from Ian Bell, numerous batsmen simply found themselves doing what they do not regularly do. The salient example came from Jonathan Trott, Flower’s “rock” at No. 3, suddenly swinging at Johnson in a manner that ensured his batting destruction. Trott’s problems were revealed to be far deeper than those on the field, but plenty of others were similarly cornered into repeated error. Their reactions transcended their actions.The Gabba result was painful and pivotal, establishing a pattern to be maintained in Adelaide. Not even a pitch that might easily have been made to Flower’s specifications could change the flow of things. So pivotal in England, Swann has been neutralised almost totally by a batting line-up handpicked to confound him. Lacking his wickets or control, the rest of the attack has sagged under the weight of added responsibility. If not quite so clearly as the batsmen, England’s bowlers are also lacking their former cohesion. Dropped first-innings catches completed a picture of misery.After the early hiccups on the first afternoon, Australia played vibrant, aggressive, confident and openly hostile cricket in Adelaide. England were harried, hurried, haunted and harangued. Jaded by fielding for two days, many of their batsmen hit out in a manner that suggested what they really wanted was a way out. Even Cook, the indefatigable leader, found himself hooking at the first short ball he received. Like Ballesteros, England have lost control of their game in a very public fashion. Three days before Perth is a very meagre space of time in which to locate it.

Also, most runs in a 50th Test, most keeping dismissals without a stumping, and greatest difference between innings scores in a Test

Steven Lynch18-Feb-2014Mitchell Johnson took 12 wickets in the first Test at Centurion. Is that the best for Australia in South Africa? asked Jim Murray from Adelaide
Mitchell Johnson’s 12 for 127 in the demolition in Centurion last week were Australia’s second-best match figures in South Africa, after legspinner Clarrie Grimmett’s 13 for 173 in Durban in 1935-36. Another Australian, the Sydney-born JJ Ferris, took 13 for 91 in Cape Town in 1891-92 – but he was playing for England in that game! The best match figures by any visiting bowler in South Africa are Sydney Barnes’ 17 for 159 in Johannesburg in 1913-14, the second-best in all Tests behind Jim Laker’s 19 for 90 in the Old Trafford Ashes Test of 1956. South Africa’s best match figures at home are 13 for 192, by offspinner Hugh Tayfield against England in Johannesburg in 1956-57; their best against Australia are 10 for 116 by Charles “Buck” Llewellyn at the old Wanderers ground in Johannesburg in 1902-03.James Faulkner won the third one-dayer against England recently by putting on 57 with Clint McKay. Is this a record for the last wicket to win an ODI? asked Phillip Thompson from Sydney
Clint McKay only needed to score two runs in that amazing last-wicket partnership with James Faulkner that spirited Australia to yet another victory over England at the Gabba last month. There has been only one higher tenth-wicket partnership to win a one-day international, and it came during the first World Cup, in 1975, when West Indies somehow overcame Pakistan at Edgbaston. Chasing 267, they were 203 for 9 when last man Andy Roberts joined wicketkeeper (and No. 8) Deryck Murray. Playing sensibly, they inched their way towards the target, and in the last of the 60 overs Roberts nudged the single that gave them victory after an unbeaten last-wicket stand of 64. Their partnership, though, took around 15 overs, compared to less than six for Faulkner and McKay. I am indebted to the statistician Andrew Samson for pointing out that there have been four higher successful tenth-wicket stands in all List A matches, including one of over 100 – in February 2006, North West’s wicketkeeper and No. 9 Thando Bula (76 not out) and last man Friedel de Wet (56 not out) put on 102 without being parted to conjure victory over Free State in Potchefstroom in the South African Airways Provincial One-Day Challenge.How many people scored only two Test centuries, both of them coming in the same match? I believe Jack Moroney was one … asked AK Srivastava from India
The Australian opener Jack Moroney was the first man whose only two centuries came in the same Test (against South Africa in Johannesburg in 1949-50). Since then this dubious distinction has been achieved just twice, both by Pakistan batsmen. Wajahatullah Wasti played only six Tests, but made two hundreds in his second one, against Sri Lanka in Lahore in March 1999. And on his Test debut, against Bangladesh in Karachi in August 2003, Yasir Hameed scored 170 and 105. Neither of them scored another Test century. This list contains one current player, who may yet remove himself from it: Peter Fulton’s two Test centuries for New Zealand to date both came against England in Auckland last March.I know that Ricky Ponting scored the most runs in his 100th Test. But who scored the most in his 50th appearance? asked Vikram Singhal from Delhi
Ricky Ponting scored 263 runs (120 and 143 not out) in his 100th Test, for Australia against South Africa in Sydney in January 2006. The only other man to score more than 200 runs in his 100th Test was Inzamam-ul-Haq, with 215 (184 and 31 not out) for Pakistan against India in Bangalore in March 2005. The most runs by a player in his 50th Test is 317, by Chris Gayle in one innings for West Indies against South Africa in St John’s in 2004-05. Tillakaratne Dilshan, with 162 and 143 for Sri Lanka against Bangladesh, in Chittagong in January 2009, also scored more than 300 runs in his 50th Test. Dilshan is the only man to score twin hundreds in his 50th match: 30 other players have marked their 50th Test with a century.BJ Watling has now made more than 50 dismissals in Test cricket – all catches. What is the record by a wicketkeeper without any stumpings? asked Zaheer Ahmed from the UAE
As of day four of the second Test against India, BJ Watling has made 53 catches as New Zealand’s designated wicketkeeper, without a stumping yet. That is the current record for a full career, although obviously he may yet escape from the list. Australia’s Wayne Phillips kept wicket in 18 Tests, taking 43 catches but no stumpings, and next comes Hashan Tillakaratne, whose 32 dismissals in 11 Tests behind the stumps for Sri Lanka were all catches. The record for most catches before making a stumping in Tests is held by Dave Richardson, the South African keeper who is now the ICC’s chief executive. He had taken 119 before finally pulling off a stumping, in his 33rd Test, to dismiss India’s Venkatesh Prasad off Paul Adams in Cape Town in January 1997. Richardson was rather relieved, as he thought if he’d never made any stumpings at all people might have thought he was a slip fielder and not a wicketkeeper.New Zealand made 503 and 105 against India in Auckland. Is this the greatest difference between two completed innings by a team in the same Test? asked Freddie Ribeiro from India
The biggest difference between a side’s two totals in the same Test is 577, by England – 849 and 272 for 9 declared – against West Indies in Kingston in 1929-30. Pakistan followed on after being all out for 106 against West Indies in Bridgetown in January 1958, and made 657 for 8 declared – mainly thanks to Hanif Mohammad’s epic 337 – a difference of 551. This considers only innings in which at least eight wickets fell – the biggest disparity overall without that qualification is 657, by Australia (729 for 6 declared and 72 for 3) against England at Lord’s in 1930. If you insist on both innings being all out, then the answer is 456 runs, by West Indies (590 and 134) against India in Mumbai in November 2011. New Zealand in that recent Test against India in Auckland provided the seventh-highest difference where both innings were all out.

The cricket was the centrepiece at Lord’s, as players and spectators celebrated the 200th anniversary of a ground steeped in tradition

Nagraj Gollapudi at Lord's05-Jul-2014There was a kid standing in the queue, shaking his legs impatiently, just like kids do when they want something. Standing in one of the tunnels, this kid – an Indian – waited with his dad to enter the Mound Stand. In one hand he held a box of chicken wings, in the other some sauce sachets and a wooden fork. As he nibbled on his food, suddenly the most famous chant in cricket rang around Lord’s: “Sachin, Sachin.” The kid stared at his dad in disbelief, wondering why he was not being allowed to watch Tendulkar bat.This is Lord’s, though, and here the stewards politely ask you to wait and enter the stands only at the end of an over. It does not matter that it is Tendulkar batting, it would not have mattered had it been Don Bradman batting. At Lord’s, a ground steeped in discipline, history and greatness, decorum is of utmost importance.Lord’s 200th anniversary was a celebration of its greatness, and great players like Tendulkar, Brian Lara, Rahul Dravid, Muttiah Muralitharan, Shane Warne, Adam Gilchrist and Shivnarine Chanderpaul. It was the only reason all these great players had been assembled by the MCC, the owners of the ground.Two hundred years old. The grand old tree of cricket has stayed strong and its roots, steeped in tradition, have only grown deeper. The ground has been witness to great matches, legendary players and turning points in the history of the game. It was fitting that this match was a sell-out and that the crowd was undeterred by the drizzle on a chilly Saturday.According to an MCC official, though tickets for the match were on sale well in advance, about 7500 were unsold until a couple of months ago. As soon as the squads were unveiled, however, and “Sachin and Dravid” featured in them, the remaining tickets sold within six hours.Walking out of the crowded St John’s Wood tube station in the morning and along packed pavements, it was hard to gauge the context of this match. Nothing was at stake. Yet people lined up obediently outside various gates with their food boxes, Pimms and wine. Some members had started queuing from 6am though the gates opened only three hours later. Dads wheeled pushchairs back and forth as toddlers napped. Tickets worth £50 reportedly went for £500 in the afternoon.For a journalist it was an exhibition game, yet to the fan the buzz and the sense of excitement was unique. When Tendulkar hit his first boundary, a classical back-foot square drive, many fans in the Mound Stand – irrespective of nationality – stood up and applauded as the ball beat a diving Tino Best. When Best bounced Tendulkar, the same crowd gave the bowler a warning. One of the uniqueness of watching cricket at Lord’s is the intimacy the ground allows between the player and the crowd.Over the decades the MCC has worked hard to preserve the traditions of the game: its ethics, values and the spirit of cricket. The Long Room, the museum and the library embody those virtues. Events like today, though ceremonial in nature, carry a lot of meaning. An 81-year-old MCC member, walked into the library and told the chief librarian Neil Robinson about having watched the likes of Bradman and Wally Hammond as a teenager. “He told me today it was so exciting to see some of the biggest names in cricket on the scorecard,” Robinson says.Ask Robinson why this game had such importance, and he points to how dear the occasion is to the players. “You just have to look at Tendulkar and Warne, who could never get on the Honours Board, but still wanted to come and play and show what this game means to them.”Next to the Pavilion is a tiny path that people in wheelchairs use to get into the ground. Sitting in his wheelchair Ian Basnett, a 55-year-old doctor, patiently waits to get in. Basnett is paralysed neck down because of an injury sustained playing rugby 29 years ago. A doctor by profession, he has been watching cricket from 1975. “I have experienced some wonderful days at Lord’s. The staff here are incredibly accommodating compared to everywhere else,” Basnett says, as a steward lets him know the cricket has resumed after a rain break.The respect between fans and caretakers is evident in the adjacent Warner Stand. This stand is more reserved, its occupants – many quintessential public school types – are quiet in celebration. When Tendulkar punches a cover drive for four, a ten-year old boy stands and waves his hands to signal a boundary. Such fanfare gets a disapproving nod and a stare from a middle-aged MCC member, wearing the egg and bacon tie with binoculars around his neck.Jashwantrai Tanna, 75, has been an MCC steward for 19 years. Today he carried his appointment letter – wrapped in plastic – with the date – April 13, 1996 – to show some of his colleagues who were skeptical about his tenure. Minutes later Tendulkar, trying to play a cheeky steer against Muttiah Muralitharn, is bowled. Tanna rushes to the front of the stand to pay his respects. Lord’s is up on its feet for a standing ovation. It is rousing. Tendulkar waves goodbye. In walks Lara. The crowd is still on its feet. The celebration continues.

A masterly quiz that tells you just why military medium is called what it is, and offers alternative names for IPL franchises

Andy Zaltzman29-Apr-20141. What should England offer Sri Lanka in exchange for coach Paul Farbrace, as a gesture of goodwill / apology / compensation / manners (delete according to preference)?(a) Kevin Pietersen
(b) Andy Flower
(c) Kevin Pietersen and Andy Flower
(d) A complimentary pair of tickets to the Lord’s Test, on the day of their choosing (excluding the Saturday)
(e) The newly released Paul Farbrace iPhone app, which recreates the former Kent gloveman’s highly regarded coaching in an easy-to-use interactive smartphone format
(f) Fifty bonus runs to be used at some point in the two-Test series this summer
(g) All of the above2. In the unlikely event that you had to make up some alternative names for IPL franchises, which of the following would you consider?(a) The Maharashtra Madams

(b) The Capital City Snutterbucks
(c) Jaipur Chicken-Slayers
(d) The Bouncing Bengal Bertrands

(e) The Karnataka Cat Attackers
(f) The Elvis Presley’s XI Punjab
(g) The New York Yankees
(h) All of the above3. Why is medium-paced bowling described as “military”?(a) If you were to force all members of an army to bowl, take speed-gun measurements of their deliveries, and calculate their average pace, it would probably work out as “medium”.(b) “Military medium” bowling was originally nothing to do with the pace of the ball. It was, in fact, named after the late-19th-century bowler Lt Col TBS Dobberson, who bowled gentle seamers for Gloucestershire, the MCC, the Gentlemen, and the Army, in a career spanning several decades. Lt Col Dobberson had a masterful control of line and length, but absolutely no interest in making the ball do anything in the air or off the pitch. His monotonous deliveries became known as “dobbers”, and his unvarying technique as “dobbing”. His primary role in the Army, however, was as a spiritual communicator with long-dead British military heroes, from whom he would coax valuable combat advice, which Dobberson’s superiors would then put into practice on the battlefield. Hence he became known as “the military medium”, a tag that subsequently became attached to his bowling style. “Dob” had particularly close working relationships with the spirits of Napoleon-vanquishing celeb the Duke of Wellington, Battle-of-Blenheim pin-up boy the Duke of Marlborough, and fiery Roman-smashing vixen Queen Boudicca. To maintain his focus when communing with these long-dead legends of the arts of war in the spiritual realm, Dobberson would mime his bowling action in slow motion.(c) In British inter-forces cricket throughout the early 20th century, all bowlers had to bowl rigidly at medium pace. The military hierarchy was insistent on fairness on the field, and considered both fast and slow bowling as being “cocky”, “deceitful” and “downright impertinent when directed at a senior officer”. Therefore, everything other than “military medium” was banned.(d) It is a misspelling of the original term “Miller Tree medium”, which dates back to the post-war Victory Tests of 1945. Australian heartthrob allrounder Keith Miller wowed the ecstatic crowds with his dashingly charismatic exploits with bat and ball, flaying opposing bowlers to all parts with a rare flamboyance and scattering stumps with his high-speed pacery. The exception was in a one-off match against St Enid’s Convent XI, in which, having lost a bet with his good friend Denis Compton about whether squirrels fall to the ground faster when drunk than sober, Miller had to play the entire match dressed as a horse chestnut tree. The limb-restricting costume considerably restricted his famous pace, and Miller took a disappointing 0 for 64 in 17 heavily foliaged overs (although it later transpired that the St Enid’s openers, Sister Beatrice and Sister Winifred, were in fact Compton and Bill Edrich in nun outfits). The term “Miller Tree medium” was concocted by commentator John Arlott, mistranscribed by legendary cricket writer EW Swanton, and soon became widely used to describe the bowling of anyone who looked like they might as well be wearing a pantomime tree costume.(e) All of the above.4. What is the origin of the term “sledging”, which refers to abusive pseudobanter by the fielding team, designed to make a batsman searchingly psychoanalyse himself, his relationship with his parents, and the point of existence, in the 0.4 seconds he has to react to a 90-mile-an-hour bouncer aimed at his gullet?(a) The first known instance of sledging was in the post-Packer non-Ashes Australia v England series of 1979-80. The Australian slip cordon attempted to distract England captain Mike Brearley by singing the chart-topping hits of the pop sensations Sister Sledge, assuming that the famously cerebral England skipper would be disco-discomforted and disco-discombobulated into playing rash strokes. If anything, the tactic backfired – Brearley had arguably his finest series, scoring two battling half-centuries against the fearsome Australiattack, later attributing his success to “finding a state of rare mental equilibrium, and a deliciously funky groove” to the Sisters’ smash hit singles “Lost In Music” and “We Are Family”. Nevertheless, the rest of England’s batting subsided, unable to focus amidst the irrepressible melodies and jive-inducing beat of “He’s The Greatest Dancer”, and “sledging” had become a part of international cricket.(b) Sledging crossed over to cricket in 1968, following the notorious men’s slalom skiing event at the Grenoble Winter Olympics that year. The race was won by French plummeting-down-a-mountain-on-two-long-thin-planks specialist Jean-Claude Killy, but not without controversy. In thick fog, his coach, Alphonse Oeureurheuroeur, disrupted Killy’s great Austrian rival Karl Schranz by tobogganing alongside the course, shouting personal abuse, and questioning Schranz’s mental and physical aptitude for top-level skiing in a fruitily languaged diatribe. The Austrian, distracted by his seemingly invisible assailant’s merciless verbal barrage, missed a gate, was disqualified, and handed Killy his third gold medal of the games. Oeureurheuroeur swiftly melted into the crowd, but his sled was later discovered with a copy of the and an empty bottle of cognac still inside it. “Sledging” had thus been born as a sporting tactic.(c) Sledging began as a ploy in medieval warfare. Nimble spies would clamber up the walls of castles at the dead of night, then perch precariously on the window ledge outside the enemy leader’s bedchamber, before whispering taunts, innuendo and invective towards the room’s occupants. Given the superstitions of the time, the insulted king or duke would awake thinking that he had experienced a visitation from an evil spirit, and consequently be completely off form in the next day’s battle. Due to the quietness required to climb onto the ledge and deliver the low-volume abuse without alerting the attention of guards, or waking the king’s wife and/or mistresses, the process became known as “ssshhh-ledging”, later conflated to “schledging”, then “sledging”.(d) None of the above
(e) All of the above5. In light of questions 1 to 4, have I watched any cricket in the last three weeks, since the World T20 final?(a) Yes
(b) NoWrite your answers on a papyrus scroll, then bury them in a hole in the ground. Winners will be notified in approximately 2000 years’ time.I will be performing my Cricket Versus the World stand-up show at The Udderbelly, on London’s South Bank, this Thursday, 1 May, at 9pm. Details here